“You taught them how to eat with a spoon, they can help you with Instagram,” said my husband with his customary dry delivery. He was right, as he often is, and my sons have been very good at helping me understand Instagram’s vibe – happy people doing fun things – and the deeper iterations of the differences between a ‘story’ post and a ‘feed’ post, and what constitutes becoming an annoyance rather than a fun way to keep up with people with no actual engagement, which if I’m understanding correctly is the point. I’m staceyuptonbracey on there if you’d like to follow me. While I quell the desire to call my Instagram name my “handle”, as if I were a trucker on his CB radio in the 70s, “10-4 good buddy, we’re rolling down the I-85, breaker one-nine, catch you on the flip-flop,” I do think it in my head. My boys assure me that I have ‘pretty good’ content and that I haven’t crossed any invisible Insta lines yet. Whew.
I’ve been learning a lot of new technology during this Corona Quarantine besides Instagram. “PicCollage” has been added as an app to my phone. It’s free and intuitive and fun without the mess of glue and no papercuts. I also went pro on my Zoom so I don’t have to bother with the 40-minute rule, and I can control more aspects of the group calls. I’ll take any little bit of control I can get these days. The walkie-talkie thing on Facebook is fun, you can leave voice messages there like we used to on people’s landlines. “FB Lives” are a bit scary as the camera counts down to one and then you’re on, but no one has professionally done your makeup so you’re shiny, and there’s a distinct feeling of not knowing your lines. I’d done a few prior, but now they are becoming a regular occurrence. I’ve accidentally erased a couple and had to do them over. It means I brush my hair, put on a nice shirt. Pants are still optional though. I could get used to that. Living in my stretchy pants and fuzzy socks has been an enjoyable part of our lockdown situation.
These new things have a learning curve, and my brain is extra-tired at the end of the day. I don’t speak technology like a native, it’s got a shaky second language feel to it. Like running up an incline as opposed to running down one. It’s not difficult enough that you chuck it as a bad idea all around, but instead take baby, sloggy steps, but you’re more tired than you expected to be at the end of it. It feels a lot like the jogs I’ve been doing here in Dallas. Dallas is remarkably flat, but it does have inclines. If you were raised in a flat section of our planet, you too have become expert in realizing that while SOME people would call what you’re running on “flat” you darn well know there is an INCLINE and that you’re going up it. An incline is less than a rise, and definitely less than a hill, but you’re working harder, no doubt.
I’ve added a couple of inclines into my jogs, and yes I go up them (early in the outing) as well as down. I always like going up first. A few weeks ago you really couldn’t call the shuffle I did a jog. Now though, I am definitely passing all people who are walking while looking at their phones. Progress. In these past 6 weeks of being forced from my native habitat of the pool to the streets, I’ve gone from 18-minute miles to 15.57 ones, which is of course, basically 16 minutes but I’m taking the 15. And that includes the inclines. Gold Stars.
While I might not be particularly great at jogging or technology, I can say with assurance that I am a good baker when I can find yeast. Last week was garlic-infused thyme and rosemary Focaccia bread, which took two tries, but I got to restaurant quality on the second one, and it could be what you get for a present moving forward. Last week I opted for a couple of loaves of honey-wheat bread but couldn’t find wheat flour so made do with unbleached white flour instead. I haven’t found bread flour in weeks, so this was all done with all-purpose flour, which has one of the best on-the-nose names ever. Below is the recipe. Simple and delicious, the magic is in the 10 minutes of kneading which is its own delightful stress reducer. I double this and make two loaves at a time, so you can eat one warm and slice and freeze the other.
WHOLE WHEAT/HONEY BREAD (1 Loaf)
1 ½ cups warm water
1 packet active dry yeast
¼ cup honey
Gently combine the above in a large bowl (not a metal one) and let sit for 5-10 minutes until you get a nice foam.
Add 3 T of melted butter (make sure it’s cooled down)
Add 2-3 cups of flour and ½ t of salt and mix.
Add an additional 1-2 cups of flour and then turn out and knead on a floured surface for 10 minutes, adding more flour as the dough gets tacky. It usually is at least another cup of flour. Eventually you’ll have a lovely, elastic dough ball.
Grease a large bowl, put dough ball in and cover with plastic wrap. Let rise 45 min to 1 hour, until doubled.
Oil a 9×5 loaf pan, punch dough down and shape into a loaf, let it rise again for 45 minutes in the pan, covered with plastic wrap.
Bake at 350 for 40-45 minutes, until top is brown. Let cool for a few minutes before releasing from pan.